Giving More To Yourself Is Important
Posted: Sunday, February 19, 2012
by Prabhjot
Something stuck me really hard while I was reading "Women and Weight Loss Tamasha" by Rujuta Diwekar. Though I knew the fact pretty much, but never had the guts to acknowledge this. And I am sure, a lot of women will agree with me.
I always had a little feminist attitude, always wondering why there is no equality between genders. This feeling only grew as I became aware of female abuse in the past and present. Issues of female abuse still exist but does that really affect my life today in Bangalore where I have the most loving family, career that I chose, husband that I chose and life that I chose ?
What we women need to realize is that there is more to life than being the "perfect wife", "perfect mother" or "perfect daughter in law". I would call it suffering from a "Perfection" syndrome. I confess that I am suffering from this syndrome and then I complain that how unfair the society is that inspite of me doing as much work as my hubby does outside the home, I have these additional responsibilities of handling the kitchen, food, clothes etc. And of course, my hubby never understands this because he doesn't have the perfection syndrome. If for once I give it up without GUILT, life would be way too better. I am still doing okie, because I do remember cooking pasta (which I love and my family hates) and having it all by myself the last weekend, but I am also aware that the frequency of this happening has reduced considerably after marriage.
Its okie if your hubby had to cook his own breakfast or if he had to go to office without a dabba. Its okie if your child missed his/her school bus today because you woke up a little late. Its okie if you forgot your father in law's medicine dose. Its absolutely fine for you to cook your favourite dish exclusively for yourself even though everybody in your house hates it. Its also very much okie to eat before your kids have eaten their dinner or your hubby has returned home from work. Its very much fine to carry dabba for yourself to office and not give one to your hubby (if he chooses not to). Its absolutely fine and recommended to throw away the left overs from your child's plate rather than stuffing your stomach like a dustbin.
Try to remember the last time you cooked only for yourself and felt great about it. Remember the last time you went for shopping only for yourself and bought some cool clothes that enhance your wonderful figure. Remember the last time you spent time on your hobbies. Remember the last time you just started dancing listening to your fav tune. If you don't remember any of these, you probably are suffering with Perfection syndrome. Make a perfect "You" by not putting your needs behind everybody else's and you will be Perfect to everybody. And of course, you will complain even lesser about how unfair the society is.
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Top-level comments on this article: (3 total)really true, i could co relate with the same.I am sure all Mothers and Wives can.
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A different Article. But I know what is my Mothers favorite Lunch. Iranian breakfast is not such varied to have favorite breakfast. Kindness is all Mother's default state. If there are exceptions it is because of deviance from natural state.Very true. Her children mean the world to a Mother.
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